The Birth Story of Raiden Zion Shaw

The c-section was also Raiden's birth. I feel like I have to remind myself that because I somehow have the two separated in my mind. They lowered the curtain for me as they pulled him out, and to me that was his birth, everything that happened around that moment was the c section.
I don't really know how to write about this, I want to be as honest as possible without sounding too negative and the truth is I don't have tons of negative feelings surrounding his birth but honestly the c-section experience kinda sucked. There were things that made it better and I am thankful for and will make note of those for sure, but jeez having a c-section is scary. All that said, now I should probably tell the story of Raiden's birthday, also known as C-Section day.
I woke up early that morning and since I couldn't eat I straightened my hair, figured that it would be nice at the hospital to not have to worry about curls. We took final belly pics in the front yard before taking Zelda to her grandparent's house.

39 weeks, day of c-section

We arrived at the hospital at 10:30, two hours before our scheduled 12:30 c-section. I was put in triage and hooked up to monitors for Raiden's heart beat and fluids through and IV for me. I liked our nurse she was young and had a good attitude. Lauren (my nurse midwife) came in at some point and talked to us for a bit, I wish I could remember the conversation better, a lot of it was just silly small talk, definitely helped me relax a little. 

I do remember the anesthesiologist coming in to talk to me about "the plan." I had thought I was just getting a spinal block but he wanted to give me the full epidural. I explained that the Dr. was going to attempt one more Version to turn the baby to see if a c-section could still be avoided, the anesthesiologist reasoned that if the turn was successful I would want the epidural in place for labor and I was like "no I would want it to wear off so I can go home and wait for labor to start naturally." The guy had no idea what to say, look of shock. Apparently our nurse had the same look. Birth without drugs?! Who does that?! Lots of people actually, but anyway, it wasn't really a big deal and the anesthesiologist said he could just remove the epidural if needed, so that was the plan. 

Finally came time to head to the Operating Room. I will never forget walking down the hall to that room, I'm not completely sure when the panic started to set in but I think that may have been the moment. It could have also been upon entering the OR and seeing how bright and sterile everything looked and seeing all of the sharp tools around the room. I did a pretty good job of holding it together but I definitely got nervous when my nurse sat me on the table to prepare for the epidural. I had been dreading the idea of the needle in my back and while it "wasn't that bad" it also wasn't very pleasant.  Everything happened pretty quickly after that, I felt my legs going numb and the nurse and anesthesiologist helped me lay down on my back. Lauren and Dr. Beceiro came in ready for the final attempt to turn my stubborn baby. Being numb was definitely helpful this time, I could feel the pressure of them trying to turn Raiden but I was able to stay relaxed because it wasn't painful this time. I closed my eyes and it actually felt like they were making progress and so for a moment I had hope that the turn might be successful this time. I heard Lauren comment that the baby didn't seem to care what they were doing, meaning his heart rate was staying at a good, normal pace. The were however not able to get a full turn so they tried turning him the other way and that's when his heart rate finally dropped, both of them immediately took their hands off and stopped. That's when I knew it was time for the c-section, and I remember Dr. Beceiro half asking half saying "so we're going to precede with the c-section," and I think I responded by nodding or saying "okay."

The blue curtain came up right in front of my face basically, it's a little weird having it that close to your face, and they began the procedure. Michael sat by my head holding my left hand in his right hand and used his left hand to periodically take pictures across the curtain. I laid there trying so hard not to think about the weird sensations I was feeling. Oh yes, you do feel a lot, at least I did. Lots of tugging and pressure, nothing sharp or painful but it's still weird. I stared at the ceiling, or the numbers on the machine that was tracking my heart rate and blood pressure, and all I could think was I never want to have to do this again. I hate to be dramatic but this is how I was feeling, as much time as I had to prepare for this mentally I was obviously not 100% at peace in that moment. Perhaps part of the difficulty for me is knowing how completely amazing the actual birth experience can be, and how completely different this experience was. I wish I could scream out loud so that everyone could understand how beautiful the real thing is, don't numb yourselves to it! Live it! But I guess that's my own personal experience and I shouldn't expect everyone to agree. 

At one point Lauren peaked her head over the curtain to my side and smiled and said "how you doing?" to which I think I forced a smile and said "good." Definitely helped lighten the mood, thus why I think Lauren is so great! I have similar memories of Lauren smiling at me when I was in labor with Zelda. Women in labor (or having a c-section) will remember very clearly how they were treated by the people helping them. 

Finally they lowered the curtain and I watched as they pulled Raiden out and brought him straight to me. Holding him helped take my mind off of the weird sensations as they began the slightly longer process of sewing me up. The Dr. checked my uterus for any abnormalities that could have prevented Raiden from turning head down. There were none. The umbilical cord was around his neck once (not a big deal) but was nice and long so that would not have been an issue if he had turned. Basically there was no reason for him not to turn, he just couldn't. I am actually happy that there wasn't any crazy story about why he didn't turn. It's hard to explain why that makes me happy but basically this whole experience is just one I was meant to have I guess. 

Lauren and Raiden

Dr. Beceiro and Lauren with Raiden

After they were finished sewing me up they transferred me to a bed that could be rolled to the recovery area. Evidently we were left in recovery for 4 and half hours because they just didn't have a room ready for us. Michael says I slept for a lot of that time while he held Raiden, I don't remember being able to sleep. I remember my face (and eventually everywhere) itching really bad from the morphine, and I remember being really upset. 

I think part of me was and probably still is, in disbelief that a c-section actually happened. It's such a strange mixture of feelings because part of me is actually thankful for the experience. Now I know what a c-section is like and I can relate to so many more women because of it. I am now on the journey of recovery from the surgery while also trying to care for a beautiful, needy newborn. I get to see what it's like trying to get back to the same level of fitness I was at before pregnancy and surgery. As far as c-sections go, mine was simple and smooth. Nothing went wrong. I am 3 weeks out and my abdomen is still sore, but I am healing well and it doesn't hurt to walk anymore. Can't wait to try running again! But for now that can wait. 

From Drug Free to Scheduled C-Section

Well we met with Lauren (my Nurse Midwife who also delivered Zelda) last Wednesday and after lots of questions we decided to schedule the C-section for this Wednesday June 24 at 12:30. I had considered still waiting until I went into labor, simply to give Raiden more time to flip, and also because I just believe it is best to let labor start naturally but we opted to schedule because that allows us to choose which Doctor and which midwife will be present for the delivery, versus if I just went into labor on my own we would have whomever was on call that day. I chose the Dr. that already attempted to turn the baby, she is planning to try to turn the baby one more time before the C-section, this time I will be numb (in preparation for the C-section) and perhaps she will have better success, however she has not given me a lot of hope for that. This particular Dr. is also known for being one of the best at surgeries. I also chose to have Lauren be present assisting the Doctor. Michael and I are very comfortable with her, we trust her, and just having her present will calm me immensely.  The C-section will also be what's called "Family Centered," this makes the experience a lot nicer. I will be able to have the curtain lowered, Michael can take pictures of the entire process, and the baby can come straight to me for some skin to skin. Provided the baby and I are doing fine there will be no reason for him to be taken away from us. 

I feel like somehow I have come to terms with the idea of having a C-section, in an odd way I have become attached to the idea. I still think it would of course be great if the final attempt to turn him works, and then we could just go home and wait for labor to start on it's own, basically back to the original plan. But as of now I have resolved in my mind that the C-section is what is going to happen. I am obviously a little nervous about the surgery itself but it's just something I have to get through. It will be an experience for sure, and it definitely gives me a different perspective into childbirth. As much as I want to work with pregnant women or just women in general whether it's as a personal trainer or a doula, it's good to have this other perspective. God definitely knows how to push someone out of their comfort zone. 
There are so many reasons that my first choice for giving birth would be without the assistance of drugs or anything other than the encouragement of my husband or a doula. It's healthier for the baby not to be exposed to so many drugs right before transitioning to life outside the womb, it allows the mother's natural hormones to work properly allowing proper bonding with the baby and ease of breastfeeding after birth. I love feeling my body working hard the way it was created to, I love the challenge, and the feeling of accomplishment after it's over. Your mind is clear and focused after baby is born and you can really enjoy those first few moments of your baby's life. 
C-section takes some of those things away from me, BUT I think it can still provide me with a very cool birth experience, not to mention this is the safest way for Raiden to be born if he's gonna insist on being breech. Nothing against normal breech birth, I know it's completely possible and if it was an option where I am I would probably try it, but it isn't. So I can't spend my time wondering if a normal breech birth would have been possible in my case. 

I am thankful for all of the friends and family who have spent so much time talking to me or listening to me while I worked through and dealt with my emotions. 
I am thankful I have had several weeks to come to terms with this.
I am thankful for everything I have learned and all of the ways I have been stretched. 
I am thankful for good prenatal care and Nurse Midwives and Doctors who's opinions I trust. 
I am thankful for mine and baby's health.

Breech Baby Update, 37 wks 5 days

Unfortunately turning the baby was not successful, the Dr. was able to easily move his head side to side but could not get his bottom up high enough to get a full turn. Baby boy's heart rate showed absolutely no sign of stress but for me it was impossible to relax so my muscles were fighting against the Dr. as well. Because of that the only other option she offered was to have me get the spinal (basically an epidural) so that way I would feel nothing and my muscles would relax enough to maybe get the baby to turn. At first this was what I wanted because I still had it in my head that there would be a successful turn and Michael and I would leave and enjoy the last few weeks of this pregnancy waiting for labor to start on its own. I had even signed the papers consenting to the spinal. However neither Michael nor I felt entirely at peace about that decision and we talked as we waited (We also prayed with Grandma and Aunt Lavonne who were able to be there for me for moral support), and came to the conclusion that we just felt like God was asking us to stop trying to turn him for now. Immediately after making that decision together the nurse walked in to start prepping me for the spinal and we just said, "oh change of plans, we don't want to do that today after all." 

So for now we are home, baby still has time to turn on his own. I think we will still need to schedule a C-section and we are meeting with my nurse midwife this Wednesday to talk about that. If that is what we do, the Dr. has said since I would be getting a spinal for the C-section anyway, she can give it one more try to turn the baby before the C-section. It would obviously be awesome if he turned on his own before that day, the Dr. is of course not hopeful for that but I am. 

My only prayer now is for God to be glorified through all of this, this is most definitely His plan and not mine :)! 

Attempting a Version Tomorrow

Well last week we met with Dr. Beceiro to talk about possibly doing a Version to turn the baby. The sonogram showed that there was plenty of amniotic fluid, the placenta is in the right place, the umbilical cord appears to be a nice length, and baby was estimated to weigh 5 lb 13 oz. All that said there does not appear to be a reason that he hasn't turned head down, it looks like he has plenty of space to be able to do it, of course there could still be unforeseen reasons why he isn't, or there could simply be no reason. So we scheduled the Version for tomorrow at 8am, Michael and I need to be there by 7am. I am not allowed any more water or food after midnight, which I am a tad nervous about because I'm used to drinking water if I wake up in the middle of the night and I have been waking with a little bit of nausea and eating actually helps that go away. I've been chugging water all day to try to make sure I stay hydrated for the procedure. They will of course, hook me up to fluids and also give me an injection to relax the uterus for the procedure.
I'm also a little nervous because the Dr. said it is usually pretty painful for women and often the reason she is not successful at turning a baby is because the mom asks her to stop.
I hope I can just breathe through it and allow the Dr. to do what she needs to do. Lauren, my midwife who also delivered Zelda is supposed to be there so that news actually makes me feel a lot better, I'm very comfortable with Lauren.
Michael and I went up for prayer at church this morning and I have of course been asking everyone I know to pray for this. I am hopeful that it will be successful, and I hope if they get him to turn that he will then stay that way.

Curtain up or Down?

I will be 37 weeks tomorrow. 
Well the last couple of weeks have been a little extra stressful with finding out at 36 weeks that baby boy is breech. I hear the words breech and automatically my mind assumes C-section is imminent, which it is if he doesn't turn. However as people keep reminding me there is still time for him to turn so perhaps I freaked out a little too early, but when you have your midwife telling you "try chiropractic care, try Moxibustion, start thinking about having a Version done, check out Spinningbabies.com" it does light a fire under you to "get to work" making baby turn. 
But that isn't the point of this post, the point is (and maybe it's just the acupuncture talking) after a couple weeks of feeling like I'm on a roller coaster ride with my emotions feeling in control and then feeling upset and out of control, I am done. I am finally free and okay with whatever the outcome of this baby's birth. Birth is very important to me, I have a very strong opinion about how I feel it should happen and when I meet other women who want to experience it the same way that I would choose to experience it, all I want is to help them and offer advice. I have come to terms with the frustrating fact that the hospital will not allow me to attempt a normal breech birth and am seriously considering that a C-section may be in my near future if this boy doesn't turn. 
I realized that I was so focused on my goal for this birth (natural and drug free) that I forgot I was even having a baby! Ultimately there is this beautiful baby boy I have been carrying inside of me for almost 40 weeks and at the end of all of this he is going to be here. Does it matter how he gets here? Yes, to me it does, that won't ever change. But what has changed is that it's okay if he arrives by C-section. Sometimes there are legitimate reasons why a baby won't turn, God knows if this is one of those cases and I am trusting Him with it. 
Yes, I was born by C-section, that's a very personal story and 100% not relevant to what I am experiencing now. 
I realized that all of this stress created by worrying about a C-section was causing me to not enjoy my last few weeks of pregnancy, (because yes these last few weeks can and should be enjoyed). But now I have changed my thinking. Today for example I got to go to the chiropractor, I am seeing one who does the Webster technique that was designed for the purpose of helping breech babies turn. It is supposed to be pretty successful. After that I got to go have an acupuncture treatment done in conjunction with something called Moxibustion, also a technique to turn breech babies, supposed to have a very high success rate. The acupuncture was great! I was incredibly relaxed and my mood improved, although I actually woke up in a pretty good mood today. After that I got to go swimming in a generous friend's pool! She was at work so she left the key under the mat for me! My mother in law was watching Zelda while I was doing the acupuncture so when I got home we all went to the pool and I just got to swim and do headstands and all that while Zelda and Mom played! It was great, I absolutely love swimming and while part of the purpose was also to help baby turn, I just got to enjoy it! 
So my point is I am enjoying all of these things I am getting to experience in these last few weeks of pregnancy. Not to mention allowing God to use it to build my faith! If that doesn't happen through circumstances like this then going through it is pointless. 

Songs speak to me and I heard this one today and I feel like it reflects how I feel right now so here is a link to that!

Casting Crowns "Somewhere in the middle"

36 weeks, Baby position

Well Monday this week we had our appointment with one of our midwives at Lonestar and she checked the baby's position with a small ultrasound machine and he appeared to be breech. This news has upset me more than it probably should but I guess anytime there is talk of C-section it's a bit upsetting for someone who doesn't even feel the need to ask for pain medication in labor because she would rather experience labor and delivery as normal as possible. The midwife was able to see that there is plenty of amniotic fluid and therefore space for baby to move around, so it's completely possible that he's still just doing somersaults in there and just has not settled down in to a nice head down position yet. But I would like him to settle asap! So I am of course doing things to encourage him to get into optimal position. There's lots of good information on Spinningbabies.com. I am going to a chiropractor for the Webster technique tomorrow and Monday I am going to an accupuncturist for the Moxibustion technique as well, meanwhile trying to do yoga and things like that during the day at home (which isn't easy since I'm trying to spend as much time with Zelda as possible).
We are also of course praying, praying, praying and putting this situation in God's hands, doesn't mean I always feel at peace but that's the goal because I need to trust God to handle this.
So sorry this post is quick and void of emotion but I just wanted to get in an update before going to bed.

35 Weeks and Running Strong

I am 35 weeks pregnant today and was so proud of myself for running hard on the treadmill this morning! 

Belly Selfie

I am very thankful for my treadmill because it is about the only place I can comfortably run now, pushing Zelda in the stroller with hills is way too hard if I want to actually run. Pushing her on a flat surface is definitely easier but I like that the treadmill forces me to maintain my pace a little more. It seems as if the further along I am getting in my pregnancy the harder I have been making myself run on the treadmill, this is not what happened when I was pregnant with Zelda but I guess I am less afraid to push myself this time. Plus I am wearing belly support whenever I run, couldn't do it without that. My calves are sore since I am running hard with all of this extra weight. I have been trying to run about every other day, sometimes every day but with a shorter run or just a walk after a hard run like today. 
A hard run for me right now is 3 miles with my pace between 4.0 and 6.2, yes that's normally slow for me but believe me that 6.2 feels like a sprint now so I can't maintain it for long but today I managed to maintain it a lot longer, woohoo! My comfortable running pace is usually at 5.0 so that I have been able to maintain a LOT longer than I was before. 
I should probably be doing more strength training, I was doing that consistently about twice a week but lately I have not been doing it at all. I was even able to fully push ups a couple weeks ago when I was still doing the strength training, maybe I should plan on starting my day with that tomorrow...we'll see. I have to admit I sleep in as late as possibly nowadays (which is usually 7ish), I used to try to get up and get a bible study or workout in before Zelda woke up but now it has been all about sleeping as long as possible. 

peaceful moments with Zelda

34 weeks; The Zelda Post

At 34 weeks pregnant the only thing I really think about anymore is sleep and how much I just want to be doing that. So why then am I awake at 3 am? Because my husband and I just spent an hour dealing with "middle of the night Zelda drama" and now I'm just wide awake, although I have to admit that scrolling through everyone else's Facebook photos is starting to lull me back to sleep. 

In preparation for the new baby (and because it just needed to happen sooner or later) we finally moved Zelda out of the crib and into my old twin bed, she was very excited about it yesterday when Daddy was setting it up in her room, so I was hopeful it would be an easy transition. And for the most part it was easy, for example she stays in it simply because we told her that was the rule. Except for at almost midnight the first night when she rolls out of it and lands on the carpet floor like a sack of potatoes. Daddy who was downstairs (still awake playing video games) hears the loud "Bang" from the upstairs and knows exactly what it is, goes up there and finds a still sleeping child on the floor, scoops her up and puts her back in bed. It's not until after he has left the room that she finally wakes and up and is quite upset. The part that gets me is that most of why she is upset is because it is Daddy who goes back into her room to help her and not Mommy. 
By now I'm awake because I hear her screaming "Mommy!" although I still have no idea that a few minutes earlier she had fallen out of her new bed. I am simply upset that Mommy is being demanded even though Daddy is already in there trying to help her. Long story short she just needed to go potty so I help her with that and my husband and I decide we need to put her mattress on the floor for the rest of the night. 
So that brings me to today, today Zelda was a bit of an emotional wreck all day probably due to not sleeping well. After church we went to Babies R Us and bought a guard rail to put on her bed. It seems to be working, it's secure and she has not fallen out of the bed. So why did she wake up tonight? Because again, she needed to go potty, why? Probably because we let her take a spill proof water bottle to bed every night. It was great when she was younger, it was part of what helped her sleep through the night in the first place but now with potty training it seems to be creating a whole new problem. The other problem is when Daddy went to her to help her, she again screamed because she really wanted Mommy to help her, there are so many layers to our problems. At first I refrained from getting up, I had hope that Zelda would get over it and be gracious to her Daddy, but she didn't. Instead she continued crying and saying she needed to go potty despite the fact that Daddy already took her and she already went successfully. It was time for drastic measures, I got up and I told her that the consequence for making up stories (a nice way of saying she was lying about needing to go potty) was that she was losing her water bottle. You would have thought I had just slapped her across the face the way she screamed about this. This reaction from her stirs up several different feelings in me, one I am just so annoyed I want to leave the room and let her scream all night, and two I feel really bad because I know how attached she is to that stupid water bottle and part of me wants to give her a second chance, or just give her the bottle because it is a sure fire way to get her to calm down and be quiet. But often times as a parent if we want to truly teach our kids it means taking the long way instead of the easy way, sometimes this can feel like we're punishing ourselves because it isn't what we would prefer to be doing at that moment. Also if there's anything I've been convicted about lately it's that as a parent I need to stick to my word. 
Zelda's a smart girl and although the concept of lying is a maybe a difficult one, I figured if she is old enough to be lying to us about things like needing to use the potty (because the truth is she does use it as a way to delay bed time, asking to go 3 times in a row, things like that) then she is old enough to learn that lying is wrong. I took the time to talk to her about this and was even able to get her to admit that she had lied. She was still upset about the consequence of having the water bottle taken away so I took the time to pray with her that Jesus would help her deal with that consequence and help her sleep. THAT was when she finally relaxed, while I was praying with her. Woohoo I feel like I had a small Mommy victory and although I know this bedtime, potty battle probably isn't over I feel like I had a huge step in Zelda's development as a person. It's difficult right now when she demands Mommy despite the fact that Daddy is right there trying to help her, she is incredibly head strong and seemingly small things send her into a screaming tantrum when she doesn't get her way (one annoying epiphany is when I realized that she totally gets that from me), but we're dealing with it and we've just learned that we have to respond quickly and very consistently with her. I have learned a lot from being Zelda's Mommy, it's a challenge and it pushes me to become stronger and to be better. Although I can completely imagine how easy life without kids might be, I wouldn't trade the things I'm learning through parenthood. I wouldn't trade the way it brings me to my knees daily in prayer because I finally realize I cannot be the kind of parent I want to be without God's strength and grace every single day. I wouldn't trade the way it's brought Michael and I closer as we face the challenges and grow and reap the rewards of it together. 
I don't know exactly what new challenges will come with this new baby and being a mom of two, but I'm finding that the challenges we face in life can all be traced back to our minds. What are we thinking about throughout the day? What is our perspective? Am I choosing to see every little aspect of Zelda that needs correcting, or am I choosing to focus on the small victories? When I pray with her and she relaxes, or when she says "thank you" without being prompted, those are my victories and I will give God all of the glory for those! 

Parkinson's 5k at 28 weeks

Okay this post is out of order but I forgot to write about the 5k I ran last Saturday. In short, it was tough, a lot tougher than the race I ran at La Cantera at 25 weeks. I guess part of what was tough was that it wasn't as cold as it was the day of the La Cantera race, it was a lot more humid. But it was one of those races where instead of feeling good after the first mile it just became more and more difficult to keep a good pace and eventually I did walk for a few seconds in the third mile. I still ran it pretty fast in 30:23. I was however a lot more sore after this race and I was exhausted for about 3 or 4 days after the race so it took a lot out of me. It was fun but I will not be doing any more races this pregnancy. At this point I need to focus on running for enjoyment and not competition, and I want to do more weight lifting and yoga/stretching. 

Pre race photo!

Speeding past my husband, if only it wasn't blurry

29 weeks Good visit with Nurse Midwife

Well this morning I had my glucose tolerance test for gestational diabetes. It will be several days at least before I get the results, but I'm not too concerned that I have it although I realize that sometimes people with no risk factors get it anyway. But after I drank the orange sugar drink and was waiting the hour before having my blood drawn I got to have my prenatal visit with the newest Nurse Midwife at Lonestar. She was great! I had heard great things about her and I definitely liked her. She was a labor and delivery nurse for 10 years before studying the 3 years to become a nurse midwife and now here she is! I asked her about all of my concerns with whether running while pregnant was going to cause extra damage to my pelvic floor or uterine ligaments. She didn't think so although she did say to listen to my body of course. She explained that pelvic floor problems are often due to genetics (hence why plenty of women who do not run while pregnant still end up with problems, it simply happens due to pregnancy and a genetic predisposition for it). So anyway I am happy to have my anxieties relieved! I can keep running, although I do probably need to scale back and slow down, no more 5k races they make me too excited and then I run faster than I probably should and hurt myself. 
I was also proud of myself because I only gained 3 pounds since my last visit 5 and a half weeks ago, but my uterus height is 28 inches which is about where it should be now! Yay! 
I also asked her to check baby's position and  he is head down, woohoo, with basically all of his body resting on the right side of my uterus. This is nice to know because when I run I do feel some weird pain in my right abdomen, I have had this for a while now, since about 23 weeks actually and it's nice to finally understand why. It's because his little body is just sitting there in my right side, guess he likes that spot, silly little dude! 

28 weeks update, ego aside do I need to stop running?

Well I am certainly feeling the effects of the 3rd trimester now. The pregnancy tiredness has returned and I just feel like I could sleep all day. Something new this pregnancy I am craving coffee on a daily basis now. With Zelda I drank nothing, not even decaf, but this pregnancy I have had decaf here and there throughout the week. But this week I am wanting full strength coffee! It's weird, I am proud to say I have not given in to that craving however today I think I will be finding me some decaf coffee somewhere.

My belly is starting to feel a little uncomfortable which I hate to admit because I still have several months left and it's just too early to be feeling uncomfortable so I will do my best to ignore it. Eating smaller meals helps with that but also I think so does that fact that I have gained less weight with this pregnancy. In a lot of ways I feel stronger this time than with Zelda, for example I think my low back was hurting a lot more by now. with this pregnancy my back feels great most of the time, if it starts to feel tight I just rest or enlist the hubs for a massage.

I am starting to wonder if I need to stop running or at least cut down a little mostly for the benefit of my uterine ligaments and pelvic floor. It's not an obvious decision because I am not having any pain or problems in these areas when I run, and I do wear belly support. I won't stay on the topic of the pelvic floor too long but after doing lots of research on the effects of running while pregnant and pelvic floor disorders I have decided that running while pregnant is not necessarily always the cause of pelvic floor disorders. However because there is definitely a possibility that running while pregnant is a contributor it is worth my time looking into some physical therapy exercises to strengthen the area, and try to be in touch with my body enough to know when it's time to put my ego aside and quit running.  Here is a link to a website I found with good information on strengthening this important area of our bodies. http://hab-it.com/videos-preg.html

All that said I have a 5k race tomorrow so I am obviously planning to run it as hard as this big belly will allow!

28 minute 5k while 25 weeks pregnant!

Wow, I blew away my goal for my 5k race Saturday! I was just hoping to run it faster than the 33 minutes it took me to run one by myself two Saturdays ago so I decided on the goal of 30 minutes, which even seemed a little steep to me.
It was a cold, rainy morning but I'm sure the cold helped. The first mile was difficult, that's when my body's basically warming up and being that I'm pregnant it takes longer for my oxygen intake and muscles to catch up to my heart rate that I'm sure shoots up into the 180's or so. That first mile is when I'm fighting to catch my breath and my quads are often cramping up, I just kept telling myself to push it because eventually my body would catch up with what I was asking it to do. Then in the second mile there was some relief which was pretty cool. I actually had a few minutes where my body was pain free and I was just running, but it felt like I was flying, and the fact that I could feel like that while pregnant was spectacular to me! This is always the mile where I try to just relax and ride the pace like a wave but I always have to be careful not to relax so much that I slow down too much. Then during the last mile I just had to dig deep and fight to keep up the strong pace, that's when I started to hurt a little again. This is where I tell myself to go to that place where it hurts because that's how I know I am running hard, that's how I know I'm doing a good job, I just kept telling myself I was brave enough to push into the pain. Somewhere during this mile I looked at my watch and realized I was keeping a pace fast enough to beat my 30 minute goal, I was so excited I almost cried! And sure enough I crossed that finish line, feeling very tired but strong, in 28 minutes and 22 seconds! It felt amazing, endorphins are great!
This is basically what I go through mentally in any race even when I'm not pregnant, the difference here was that the pace I was trying to maintain was slower than normal obviously. I loved being able to experience pushing myself like this while pregnant. I really didn't push myself quite like this when I was pregnant with Zelda, I was a lot more cautious then. I hope people don't think I'm not being cautious this time because I really still am, it's just that this time I know my baby and I are not fragile.  (There are things you and your OB or Nurse midwife in my case, can check on to make sure exercise is safe). I'm still feeling this little guy move all the time, so I know he's fine. I know that his heart rate rises when I work out and therefore he probably needs time to recover from that race just like I do. But it's good for him and it's good for me and I can't wait to see how much easier recovery and getting back to running will be after I have him.
One thing that I am dealing with this time is varicose veins, only in my right leg. It's interesting because I think normally running helps prevent them, however pregnancy can cause them. I escaped them with Zelda but I have them now. Exercise does make them worse because of the increased blood flowing through the veins, so I've started wearing compression tights anytime I work out. Yes it's a pain, but wearing the tights really does help, once I'm not pregnant my hope is that I won't need the compression tights anymore. Plus the tights I got really help support my belly when I run so that's good!

I LOVE lettuce wraps!!!

Okay this blog is supposed to be about healthy nutrition as well as exercise, time for a recipe post. One of my favorite foods is lettuce wraps! Take about any kind of meat, put it in lettuce and voila, you've got a healthy, and hopefully delicious meal right there! It's so simple and so healthy I just get excited thinking about them! 
Tonight I made chicken lettuce wraps, I seasoned half of the chicken with lemon pepper and the other half with "chicken seasoning," and then broiled it. 
Put it in the lettuce and then for toppings I used cilantro, mozzarella cheese, avocado, and cucumber. Put a little dressing on it, I recommend Creamy Avocado, although Italian works well too. And there you have it, easy, delicious, low carb, gluten free (unless it's in the dressing, I didn't check), and most importantly yummy dinner!
I served them with a side dish of homemade Pearl Cous Cous cooked in Chicken broth with lemon juice, peas, and freshly grated parmesan cheese. 

Cilantro, avocado, cumber, and mozzarella.

Large cubed chicken, broiled both sides about 5 minutes each side. Broiling keeps chicken nice and tender.

Dinner is served!

Zelda approved (her lettuce is full of cous cous).

I love this shot of her eating her cous cous wrap.

25 weeks and 5k Ready

I am 25 weeks pregnant today! It's crazy to be over half way already, time is definitely flying faster with this pregnancy than the first. I am feeling pretty good, there isn't much to complain about (although I still do). I still have days I need a nap and my low back is a little achy but it's not bad. I have continued exercising at a higher intensity this time by doing Insanity which I did not do when I was pregnant with Zelda. I have a 5k this coming Saturday so I will be resting for the next few days leading up to it. Last weekend I ran a 5k on my own to see how fast I could go, I did it in 33 minutes so for Saturday my goal is to beat that time! The race atmosphere always helps me go faster! Not gonna lie, running is not easy right now, it took a lot of effort to push myself last weekend, my legs and back cramp up a lot and I have to stop and walk often. It's okay though because pushing myself always feels good and I need this race to stay excited about running! 

I am feeling this baby boy move A LOT everyday, I love it!

I have Braxton Hicks quite a bit but I'm pretty sure I had that a lot with Zelda as well. 

This pic was taken at 24 weeks

19 Weeks Active Baby

I'm so excited because yesterday Michael finally got to feel the baby move! I've been feeling it for about two months now so it's nice when I can share that with my husband! The baby was very active last night and has been a lot today too, it's great I love feeling that movement! 
Zelda and I have been battling some virus or something for several days, well for me at least it started exactly one week ago. I thought it was just allergies so I continued running as normal, finally the last few days my body has refused to let me do that, but I still found time for some quick weight lifting and today since we both are getting better I finally got out for a 3 mile walk/jog and plan to do some weight lifting in a bit (followed most likely by a nap). 
This pregnancy seems to be flying by, I know it's not over yet but we find out the gender Monday, and we haven't even taken one belly pic yet! With Zelda I guess I had more time focus on that belly not that I don't think about it every day, I just have other things to focus on this time I guess. 

15 Weeks Feeling Good

Well I am safely into the Second Trimester, and feeling much better most days! Still tired I guess but not nearly like I was in the First Trimester. I have been doing Insanity, although please understand that I am a fitness professional and I know how to and do make modifications to the work out as needed. I am running more and still lifting weights, just generally feeling pretty good and normal! Yesterday Michael and I had an appointment with the nurse midwives, we got to hear the baby's heart beat which is always great. We scheduled our appointment to find out the gender for a month from now, can't wait!

On another topic, I am a new Ambassador for For Two Fitness and am thrilled to partner with them for an amazing New Year giveaway. They sell really cute maternity fitness apparel which I have heard amazing things about but as of yet have not had the opportunity to wear yet, but I really hope to during this pregnancy! Check out the details below from For Two Fitness:

Happy New Year! We are so thankful to YOU — our community, customers, and friends. To express our thanks, we are hosting a huge giveaway this week in partnership with some amazing brands and our ambassadors. The Grand Prize is valued at $1000.  We have phenomenal prizes, including the newest offering from BOB - a Revolution FLEX  jogging stroller - plus prizes from ASICS, Ergo and Maison Drake baby boutique, and For Two Fitness – all facets of your healthy mom lifestyle are in this prize pack!

The grand prize winner will win everything you see listed here.  Prizes have been furnished by our wonderful brand partners in connection with a sponsoring ambassador (Katie from Mom’s Little Running Buddy and Melody from Will Run For Margaritas). Here are more details about the amazing products that have been generously donated for you to win and enjoy:

Grand Prize Giveaway items:
The New BOB Revolution FLEX single stroller
For Two Fitness maternity athletic outfit (top and bottom of winner’s choice)
Ergo 360 Baby Carrier furnished by Maison Drake baby boutique
Asics Running Shoes (1 pair of the winner’s choice)

Wow!  We are thrilled to give away these amazing prizes.  This contest runs from Monday, January 12th through midnight on Friday, January 16th.  Visit the For Two Fitness site to enter.  Be sure to follow @ForTwoFitness and our co-hosts @run4margaritas and @momslrb on Instagram in order for your entries to be valid.

Thanks for celebrating the New Year with us!  Good Luck!!